Residing underneath the deepest misunderstandings lies a desire to connect and be understood. For those of us up to the challenge marriage and other commited love relationships provide not only an opportunity for connection and understanding but also a spiritual path throught which we get to know ourselves more deeply.
Through the process of couples therapy I operate as a process consultant with the aim to help couples:
-Name and reduce the negative cycles they get caught in.
-Explore defences that no longer serve the relationship.
-Create safety to bring forward underlying feelings and longings for connections.
-Support safety enhancing patterns so that partners can tolerate more vulnerability
-Consolidate the new cycles of communication and reinforce new and lasting patterns of security.
In working with couples I primarily work from an approach called Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) that supports healthy adult attachment. EFT is an empirically supported humanistic treatment that arose out of emotion and attachment theories. I also incorporate Stan Tatkin's psychobiological apprach as well as Hal and Sidra Stone's Voice Dialogue into couples treatment.